Good and Bad Manners – Taiwan Style

Each culture has its own idiosyncrasies. In the West it’s considered bad to belch at the table. In Asia it’s a sign of satisfaction with the meal. I was brought up to arrive on time everywhere – it’s a no-no in many countries, especially for dinner. A hearty handshake in most Western countries is a sign of affection – in most Asian countries including the Philippines it’s as offensive as taking a firm grip on someone’s bottom lip.

Living in Taiwan, I’ve seen the usual no-no’s at the dinner table. Never put your chopsticks upright in your rice – it is a symbol of death. Don’t hold your rice bowl and lift the rice to your mouth – you should lift the bowl and use the chopsticks to guide the rice into your mouth. Drink soup out of the bowl – don’t use a spoon. Don’t play the drum-track to 50 Ways To Leave Your Lover on the table with your chopsticks…

These are all standard and a bit ho-hum. One thing I really noticed when I first came here was queue etiquette. First of all everyone queues automatically. No sprawling groups, just neat lines. But here’s where it gets a little odd: if you delay or are inattentive it is perfectly okay for others to push in front of you.

Now, I can’t guarantee that this doesn’t only apply to Westerners, but I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve been placidly standing in a queue at a 7Eleven or an airport, politely allowing a foot of space between myself and the next person only to have someone brusquely push in front of me, treading on my toes in the process. The immediate impression was that they just didn’t notice me there, towering over everyone else, but if I made any comment I’d receive either a blank look or a glance of irritation.

Exiting a crowded lift works the same: the doors open and the waiting people immediately push forward to enter, ignoring the fact that I am stepping out. I have often wanted to say, ‘You do understand that you cannot get in here until I have gotten out, right? Let me make some room for you, ferchrissakes…’ But I’ve learned it is actually simpler just to push back as much as they push forward, and no one is offended.

Now, is this bad manners? It is in the West, but obviously not here. In fact one way I can look at it is that if you’re dawdling or hesitating that’s fine for you, but you’re actually delaying and holding up the people behind you, so you deserve the sneers and brusque handling.

What do you think? Or am I just a wimp?

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Tags: 7eleven, Array, Asian Countries, Bottom Lip, Chopsticks, Dinner Table, Firm Grip, Glance, Good And Bad Manners, Handshake, Idiosyncrasies, Living In Taiwan, Neat Lines, Queues, Rice Bowl, Sign Of Affection, Spoon, Table Etiquette, Toes, Western Countries, Westerners